You need to know about Moscow Water Dogs

Human’s best friend… the dog. I want to tell you about one specific dog breed today.

Humans started domesticating good dogs around 15,000 years ago - the very first animal that humans domesticated apparently.

I often wonder who the first human was who said: hey, that grey wolf over there should come live in my tent with me.

And what did the rest of his or her friends think of that? Like, were they ostracized? Did the guy get completely mauled by the wolf in the end? Did all humans immediately think “woah that’s such a good boy” and then everyone wanted one?

AND WHAT DID THE WOLF’S PACK THINK?

Adding that to my list of places to pop by when I finally get my time machine.

Anyway, fast-forward to modern day and we’ve turned the noble wolf into a lot of ridiculous breeds and are generally obsessed with our dogs.

What exactly defines a “breed”? They’re theoretically a grouping of features that “breed true”. Meaning that if you breed any random two animals of a breed, they always pass down the same traits to their offspring. The pair of alleles that express the trait are the same so you’re not going to see variation there except for in the cases of mutations.

So, back to the point of all this - the Moscow Water Dog.

Let’s set the scene: it’s just after WWII in the Soviet Union. Colonel G.P. Medvedev is commanding the state-run Central Military School of Working Dogs. Things are pretty good at the school except there aren’t many working dogs left because of, you know, the war.

Colonel Medvedev’s glorious job is to create new Russian breeds of working dogs, of course. First order of business? Breed the ULTIMATE WATER RESCUE DOG.

Right, so: dog that can work hard, swim well in rough Russian seas, survive in icy cold temperatures, and then rescue people and bring them back to a ship. A classic good boy or girl.

Medvedev got to work breeding fluffers. He and his team built an incredible dog, capable of swimming through huge waves in sub-zero temperatures, through blizzards and ice floes, and find humans.

Except for one small hiccup they just couldn’t figure out.

These new puppers had a slightly problematic tendency to attack and bite and drown the victims rather than rescue them.

lol

Now, yes all dogs are good dogs. But these ones weren’t particularly great at their jobs. Awkward. I wish I was in the meeting where the poor Colonel had to explain to his superiors how the program was going….

So anyway, if you’re not sure if you’re doing a good job today, at least you’re probably not breeding a rescue dog that drowns people?